The paranormal community is a dynamic world that is both fascinating and captivating – filled with dedicated individuals seeking to unravel the mysteries of the unknown. However, this community is also one that is too often plagued by petty drama, infighting, and unproductive conflicts. This is also known as paranormal drama.

I’ve seen quite an influx in online paranormal drama in the last few years. From taking jabs at someone’s weight, joking about someone’s trauma, bringing kids into arguments, dedicated groups on Facebook to make fun of people, and false accusations for sympathy…the online community has taken a strange turn.

The Downside of Passionate, Sensitive Souls

Why does this happen? A big part of it comes down to a lack of emotional intelligence. Many in the paranormal field are highly intelligent people, but emotional intelligence (also known as EQ) – the ability to understand, manage, and reason with emotions – is often lacking.

Those drawn to the paranormal world tend to be highly intuitive, sensitive souls. Their passion for the unexplained can make them quick to take offense, leap to conclusions, and engage in unproductive feuds. Egos can get involved, with researchers and investigators vying for attention, credibility, and influence in the community.

The Real Heroes Don’t Have Time for Drama

But here’s the thing – the individuals doing the most meaningful, impactful work in the paranormal field usually don’t have the time or energy to get caught up in this kind of drama. They are too busy researching, writing, investigating cases, planning events, and pushing the boundaries of our understanding of the unknown.

The researchers, authors, and event organizers making real contributions are the ones buried under stacks of case files, pouring over historical records, experimenting with new technologies, and coordinating complex investigations. They don’t have the luxury of engaging in petty squabbles or publicly jousting with rivals.

So when conflicts do occur, it takes their attention away from the work. This also adds another layer of negative thoughts and feelings because they’re distracted on something petty instead of their book, next investigation, their videos, etc.

The Cost of Unproductive Drama

Lately, I’ve noticed that the drama tends to be perpetuated by those on the fringes of the community – individuals seeking attention, validation, or a sense of importance that they can’t achieve through their own substantive work. They fill the void with gossip, speculation, and accusations. They create vague posts so people will ask questions or blindly pledge their support. They’ll post vague screenshots that don’t actually prove or show anything. They may also even share private messages that should stay private.

But this drama comes at a cost. It distracts from the genuine, meaningful work being done. It sows division and mistrust within the community. And it turns off potential new researchers and investigators who might be interested in getting involved. It pulls brilliant people away from important work.

Another thing that pops into this writer’s mind is that how some of these people can call themselves empathetic paranormal investigators and mediums when they can barely manage interacting with the living in a productive way? Something to think about.

A Call for More Emotional Intelligence

The paranormal community would be so much stronger, so much more productive and impactful, if we all focused more on emotional intelligence.

This also includes:

• Understanding our own triggers and biases.
• Communicating with empathy and nuance.
• Elevating each other’s work rather than tearing each other down.

There is so much left to discover in the world of the paranormal. So many mysteries waiting to be unraveled. But that important work can only be done effectively when we come together in a spirit of mutual respect, collaboration, and intellectual humility. The drama needs to stop – the real heroes of the paranormal field are too busy changing the world to waste time on it.

The other aspect to consider is attempting to resolve conflicts in person. Going online does add a layer of dehumanization when you only see text on a screen. The keyboard is very good at stripping away the idea that the person you’re having issues with is an actual human being. I’ve found there’s been considerable resolution by picking up the phone and calling the person. Does it always work out perfectly? Of course not. But it’s a step in the right direction.