If you’ve been following me on social media, then you know that I’ve crossed the threshold into burnout. A paranormal burnout. What’s exceptionally sad is that I’m not even investigating that much these days. It’s the constant engagement with the community, research, writing, creating content, it’s all been a bit too much. My mind was starting to deteriorate, and I felt like I didn’t know how to exist anymore. Honestly, it got terrifying for a while.
Is there such a thing as too much of a good thing? Definitely.
Regular Burnout
I find myself in burnout almost regularly, and it made me realize that I needed a break. It also has made me realize that what I was doing wasn’t really working, at least not without some help. Releasing a weekly video, a weekly blog, and a weekly podcast by myself is absolutely insane. But, given that my audience was growing and growing fast, I felt incredibly pressured to continue releasing content on a schedule to keep that momentum going. My biggest fear was that people would leave if I stopped creating content. Not to mention, I had to start investigating again so I could go through that data and create even more content. It’s a vicious cycle.
Eventually, the ongoing creation of content became too much, and I felt like I was going crazy. I barely had time for peace and quiet. What concerned me the most was that I was really starting to resent everything in the paranormal. From ghosts, watching investigations, reading and retelling stories, engaging with the community, it was becoming too much.
So many people told me how much The Spooky Stuff and the Association of Paranormal Study meant to them, so I put pressure on myself to continue cultivating that community. Many finally found a place of belonging in my groups, and I know personally how valuable that is.
Constant Criticism
But, as criticisms of my work came in, it wasn’t helping my mental health. Growing up in the entertainment industry, I’m no stranger to criticism. In fact, I usually welcome it. But there were a select few who constantly criticized my work, and what made it really difficult was that they were friends as well. I valued their opinion. So, when I was getting hit with constant negativity about my content, I took it hard, especially when they never had anything positive to say. I started to wonder whether I was really cut out for this, or if it was time to throw in the towel.
I also got hit with people telling me how to create content, how I need to change my content to better suit their needs, etc. These days, I’m creating content not only for myself, but for the future of paranormal investigators, which mainly consists of the younger generation like teens and college students. In trying to meet them at their level, it means that the style of my content has changed as well. That may not appeal to older generations. In fact, I know it doesn’t because they’ve told me.
I couldn’t continue taking it all in anymore. It was truly exhausting to have multiple people attempt to mold me into what they needed. Remember, I’m offering my content for free, besides book sales. I created APS and The Spooky Stuff because it made me happy.
But it was no longer making me happy. It was making me miserable. It was triggering some really bad anxiety and catastrophizing behavior. I started regressing bad to harmful habits that got me requiring medical intervention. Was it all worth it anymore?
No. It wasn’t.
Making a Decision
I didn’t want to shut it all down…yet. Also, I didn’t want to torch the bridge. I think people forget that content creators are people too. We’re producing content to the best of our ability and to our capacity. Honestly, hats off to the people who investigate regularly, are parents, and continue to produce content. It’s just me, my fiancé, and the cats and I’m barely holding on. I also work a full-time job as well as a part-time job, so that might have something to do with it. Oh, did I mention I’m planning a wedding?
I decided to take a month off from publishing content as well as taking a step back from social media. What was interesting what that I was still creating content. I could only sit on my hands for so long before I was itching to write. But I couldn’t go back to the vicious cycle that I was used to. No. I wouldn’t even survive a week if something didn’t change. I had to make a decision.
When I returned in September, I had to start creating distance between myself and my followers. I had always took pride in the fact that I engaged with everyone and gave them a voice. But, I had to start setting some pretty hard boundaries as well as just ignoring people who were no longer a positive presence in my online life.
Exhausted by the Living
Truly, it wasn’t the ghosts or the stories that I was tired of; it was living people. From people commenting on my articles without reading them, to the criticism, to just plain meanness…I couldn’t take it anymore from the living. But I can’t let that affect what I love…at least not anymore.
At the end of the day, I still love the paranormal. I love ghost stories, I love investigating, and I love reading about how the paranormal has shaped us as a society. All of this is still so fascinating to me.
Personal Responsibility
Finally, another source of my burnout was…me. I wasn’t satisfied with the direction that my paranormal journey was taking me. It wasn’t anyone else’s fault but my own. My team is fabulous but I was doing a terrible job at steering the ship. Essentially, I was letting my burnout, my fear of falling outs, and just my anxiety-filled existence keep me from the very reason I fell in love with the paranormal.
Moving Forward
I have to build up my self-awareness and know the signs of future burnouts. I’ve started recognizing those negative feelings. Once I start encountering those feelings again, I know it’s time to take a step back and take a break. However, I also know that I also need to wait 24 hours before I respond to something. Is it a perfect plan? Definitely not. But I have to change something. Otherwise, I’ll continue to repeat this vicious cycle until I’m merely a shell.
Tips for Dealing with Paranormal Burnout
This list isn’t perfect, but it definitely helped me in dealing with my paranormal burnout.
- Research the signs of burn out and assess whether there’s too much stress in your life
- Take a break
- Step away from social media
- Do something different for a while (theatre, knitting, reading, skateboarding, hiking, etc.)
- Journal every day
- Go back to the things that make you happy
- Learn how to identify the negative feelings
- Wait 24 hours before responding to negativity
- Sort through why you became burnt out
- Create a list of action items you can do to prevent burnout
- Go back to your roots as to why you fell in love with the paranormal
- Set boundaries and enforce them
- Know that not every person deserves a response from you
- Sleep…get as much sleep as you can
- Don’t feel ashamed of taking a break
- Decide whether you’re really burned out or just done.
- Prioritize YOU
- Forgive yourself
- Listen to your needs and meet your needs
- Talk to a therapist