Has COVID-19 Caused More Hauntings?

There’s something we should talk about. It’s been the elephant in the room for a while. It’s changed our entire lives and turned the world upside down. I’m talking about COVID-19. Coronavirus.

It’s maddening to think how much our lives have changed since this virus invaded our world. And there’s something that people are hesitant to talk about. But, it’s important. Sometimes, we want to wait before we talk about these difficult things. This is because we want to give the living enough time to grieve and process, and we want to basically respect a boundary.

Yet, the news has seemed to beat us to these tough conversations. For this blog, I’m straying away from the spooky stories from the past and let’s talk about what’s happening now and how to process it. Let’s dive into it head on. This is spooky, but I’m going to keep this respectful. The intention is to have a conversation about this, so please feel free to leave comments and share your thoughts.

Noticing Spirits More

So, when COVID-19 hit the United States, we went into lockdown.  The entire world went into lockdown. We found ourselves in our homes way more often than we’re used to.

Now, this wasn’t a dramatic change for some because they are homebound. But for the general population, this was a completely new way of existing and living for the sake of staying safe. After the lockdowns were enforced, the New York Times released an article of how more people were reporting that their houses were haunted.

I even released a blog last year about how to survive quarantine with a ghost because I was getting an uptick in questions and case submissions. Of course, because of COVID, my team and I had to push the pause button on our residential cases. But, I was doing Zoom calls and consultations with folks who felt like they had a ghost in their house.

Language of the House

Given that people found themselves home much more than usual, I wasn’t surprised that this was happening. In fact, when we do residential cases and our clients consist of a married couple, the spouse that’s home the most is usually the one reporting the activity. Conventionally, this is usually the stay-at-home wife and mom. The husband will be there for moral support, but he doesn’t believe it as much because he’s not home to experience it.

And with the lockdowns, all of a sudden, people were home all the time. But there’s two sides to this. This is my skeptical-side talking. If someone hasn’t been home much since moving in, they might not be that familiar with everything in their home. Meaning, they might not know that a truck drives back Monday through Friday three streets over that causes the cabinets to open and shut.

They’re being forced to get to know all the sounds and movements their house makes. And if they didn’t know that’s what their house does, then it’s no surprise that they may interpret that as paranormal.

Then, talking from my believer side, I can totally see this happening. Like, the ghost in your house is able to relax and expel energy while you’re gone. But now that you’re home all the time, you and the ghost have to find a way to co-exist.

Lack of Closure

So, this is one side of the paranormal during the COVID-19 pandemic. This next part is a bit more sad.

Over 600,000 people in the United States have died from COVID-19 at the time of this video. Worldwide, almost 4 million have died. The deaths surrounding COVID-19 are exceptionally sad because when the dying were in the hospital, they more than likely died alone. They weren’t able to be with their families as they died.

This very much reminds me of the soldiers and families that died during the Civil War, or any war for that matter. Lack of closure, the inability to say goodbye. It’s no coincidence that certain periods of time, like war, are tied to more hauntings than just the average chapter in history.

I feel like, like the plague or the Spanish Flu, illnesses that have a lot of paranormal lore tied to them, we will continue to see reports of people interacting with the ghosts of their loved ones who died from COVID-19. And it seems, because of this lack of closure, is it possible that spirits of our loved ones are trying harder to make contact with us?

Saying Goodbye

In June 2021, CNN’s John Blake released an article titled, “They lost their loved ones to Covid. Then they heard from them again.” Last fall, Ian Horne lost his wife Michelle, who died from complications of COVID-19. Of course, losing a spouse is devastating, especially when they’re young.

So, Ian, who works as a radio DJ, was driving to work. It was pre-dawn, early in the morning, so it was dark. As he was driving, he noticed that about two dozen streetlights on his route turned purple. Which is weird. Especially since Michelle’s favorite color was purple. When Ian contacted the city about the lights, they attributed it to a defective batch.

The article also tells the story of Jamie Jackson, who lost her “Aunt Pat”, who died from complications of COVID-19. She had a heart attack. The hardest part for Jamie is that she couldn’t be physically present with her aunt while she was dying.

About seven months after her Aunt Pat’s death, it was Christmas time and Jamie was using her Aunt’s decorations. She left her bin of decorations in the hallway, and went to get something.

When Jamie came back, she saw a translucent figure looking in the bin. The figure was the same height, had the same haircut, and wearing the same clothes her aunt would wear. Jamie freaks out and runs to her dining room to calm herself down. When she went back into the hallway, the figure was gone.

Choosing Our Form

One more story. Marie Pina was living in Manitoba, Canada teaching English as a second language when the COVID-19 outbreak started.

Her 79-year old mother had been in the hospital and she was just about to be released when she tested positive for COVID. Her mother, Inez, was put in isolation. About a month later, her mother was sent home, but she became significantly weaker. Her mother died about four months later.

On the morning of her mother’s death, Marie was reaching for her slippers when she felt her mother touch her shoulder. According to Marie, she saw her mother when she looked up. Her mother was about 20 years younger and was just looking straight ahead. Then, a little bit later, Marie was making her mom’s favorite soup when she smelled her mother’s perfume.

I have a feeling that these three stories aren’t the only ones we’ll see in the future.

6 Times the Paranormal Made It to Court

Can you put a ghost on trial? Apparently, you can! It’s always really interesting when the paranormal makes its way to the courtroom. Considering that we can’t really prove that the paranormal exists in the first place, it’s always compelling when a judge allows a supernatural-based testimony to come through. But one has to wonder, if the paranormal can be allowed in testimony and opening/closing arguments, could a lawyer be arguing for a case of insanity? Or could the paranormal be used to show that a witness can’t be trusted?

In this article, we’ll explore six court cases that involved paranormal incidents and testimonies. As you read, think about whether you would believe these witnesses if you were part of the jury. If you don’t feel like reading, check out the video below!

Jury Uses a Ouija Board

This first one is wild. Jurors used a Ouija board to help determine whether or not someone was guilty. In 1994 in the UK, a man named Stephen Young was arrested for the murder of Harry and Nicola Fuller. 

Nicola had been shot three times and Harry had been shot in close range. It was truly a gruesome crime that shocked the community. Stephen Young’s trial lasted for five weeks, and he was ultimately found guilty. But about a month after the trial, a newspaper headline was released that said, “Murder Jury’s Ouija Board Verdict.”

One of the jury members came forward to the media. They claimed that four people from the jury used a makeshift Ouija board to contact the spirits of Harry and Nicola Fuller. The jury members put their hands on the glass and asked for the spirit of Harry. The glass went to Yes. Another juror asked, “Who killed you?” The glass spelled out “Stephen Young Done It”. When the juror asked how, the glass spelled out, “Shot.” A new trial was ordered, and another five weeks later, Stephen Young was found guilty once again.

The Devil Made Me Do It

I covered this story in greater detail in a previous post, so I’ll keep this brief. In 1981, Arne Cheyenne Johnson was arrested for the murder of his landlord, Alan Bono. Before the murder happened, the little brother of his fiance, David Glatzel, had reportedly been possessed by over 60 demons. Arne told the demons to come into him…meaning that Arne was possessed at the time he murdered Alan Bono. Ed and Lorraine Warren were also involved in the situation. Arne’s lawyer tried to use the argument of possession for the defense, which the judge refused. Arne pleaded not guilty by reason of self-defense. He was found guilty and served five years of his 10-20 year sentence. This story was recently featured in the movie, The Conjuring 3: The Devil Made Me Do It.

Ghostbusters Ruling

When it comes to paranormal cases, this one is the one that created the famous Ghostbusters Ruling. This case is also known as Stambovsky v. Ackley. It’s not uncommon for house sellers to disclose unpleasant information, like whether a murder, suicide, death happened in the house. Some states also require sellers to report whether or not the house is haunted, which is pretty wild. The Ghostbusters Ruling was about a home at 1 LaVeta Place in Nyack, New York. It’s a historic house that was a boarding house turned private residence in the 1900s that was purchased by George and Helen Ackley in the 1960s.

It wasn’t long before the Ackleys started to experience paranormal activity. Helen even wrote a piece about it called “Our Haunted House on the Hudson.” The piece was featured in the May 1977 issue of Reader’s Digest. The Ackleys believed the house was haunted by a ghost named Sir George, who lived in the area in the 1700s. George Ackley passed away, and Helen wanted to retire in Florida. She put the house up for sale, and a man named Jeffrey Stambovsky bought the house. But once Stambovsky found out about the alleged haunting, he filed an action requesting rescission of the contract of sale for damages for fraudulent misrepresentation. Initially, the case was dismissed. But he appealed, and he won. Did I mention that he never moved in?

Helen Ackley sold the house to someone else, and she moved to Florida and passed away in 1991. Her son-in-law believes that she now haunts the house.

Florida Ghost Lease

This next case took place in Orlando, Florida in 2005 when a building owner filed a lawsuit against one of his renters because they refused to pay rent. The restauranteurs had refused to move in and claim they couldn’t honor their lease because the property was haunted. Christopher and Yoko Chung, who were also Jehovah’s Witnesses, claimed that there were ghostly apparitions and because of their religious beliefs couldn’t fulfill the obligations to their lease. The building itself has had a history of ghosts, and paranormal experts believe that the ghosts are those of children who were kids of prostitutes who were killed. I wasn’t able to find what happened with the ruling, but if their lawyer cited the Ghostbusters Ruling, I bet they might have won.

Haunted Ohio Farm

This next case is crazy because it means that even writing about a haunted location can get you sued. The owners of Staley Farm sued the authors of the book, “Weird Ohio”, because their property became overrun by ghost hunters. The farm had been featured in the book because the family patriarch, Old Man Staley, murdered his entire family with an axe.

The ghost story goes that if you drive down Staley Road at night, it will feel like someone else has taken control of your car, horns honking by themselves, and headlights dying. Also, the ghost of Old Man Staley has supposedly been seen in the woods. The plaintiffs claimed that the authors of the book were responsible for the influx of trespassers. However, what saved the authors was the disclaimer at the beginning of the book that says, “The reader should be advised that many of the sites described in Weird Ohio are located on private property and should not be visited, or you may face prosecution for trespassing.”

Gamble’s Ghost

My good friend Michelle Hamilton told me about this story, which actually inspired this video. So thanks, Michelle! Check out her work on Amazon. It’s good stuff. In 1854, in Wetzel County, VA (now WV) Leban Mercer was tried for the murder of John Gamble. Gamble owed Mercer $2 for the purchase of a calf. When they spoke, he only had large bills on him totaling to about $200. Apparently, Gamble and Mercer agreed to meet later. And Mercer was the last person to see Gamble alive.

Gamble’s boat was later seen floating down the river. Mercer returned at 2am that morning all wet and muddy with a bunch of cash in his pocket. Gamble’s body was still missing. One night, a man named John Hindman claimed that Gamble’s ghost appeared to him. The spirit told him that he was murdered by Mercer.  Mercer was acquitted due to lack of sufficient testimony.

A Different Kind of Therapy: Processing Trauma with Ghost Hunting

In March 2020, I was participating in an online meetup by my team, Association of Paranormal Study. We were chatting with Dr. Ann Winsper and Dr. Rachael Ironside, two well-respected female academics in the paranormal and parapsychology field. Towards the end of the conversation, it was brought up that people use ghost hunting to process trauma. My mind went absolutely wild.

Whether we like it or not, trauma is the norm of our world. It’s not a new thing either. For thousands of years, mankind has been through some sort of trauma. Examples include war, famine, slavery, abuse, just to name a few. This is a constant occurrence in the existence of man, and it’s not stopping anytime soon. If anything, modern society is bringing about new forms of trauma every day.

That trauma is what echoes from the past into the future. Those are the echoes that modern day paranormal investigators are trying to communicate with. When we look at the common definitions of “spirits” and “ghosts”, they can be related back to processing trauma. Earthbound spirits normally have some sort of unfinished business.

What is Unfinished Business?

The term “unfinished business” is fairly vague. It’s a very general blanket statement describing something that person cannot let go of. I suppose that could include leaving the stovetop on (I wonder that everytime I go out) to getting revenge on someone who hurt that person. That hurt could be anything from a failed business translation, assault, or asking for forgiveness. “Unfinished business” is an extremely general term that we often don’t talk about enough in the paranormal world. Asking general questions in the dark and speculating what that unfinished business is isn’t enough.

But it’s not only the spirits who have unfinished business. This is something that the living has as well. How often do paranormal investigators have an experience and want to keep ghost hunting to “search for the truth” and find the answers to the afterlife? Boom. Most of us have unfinished business based on that alone, and we’re processing our own form of trauma from that spooky experience.

Grieving Through Ghost Hunting

For me personally, while I had spooky experiences as a child, I also struggle with the idea of death. I lost the majority of my core family members before I turned 30. Even then, I lose two major parental figures before I was 15 years old.

I struggle with the idea of our consciousness not surviving after death. While most people gravitate towards religion and the idea of heaven to alleviate those fears, I chose ghost hunting. I go on paranormal investigations to get some sort of sliver of proof that after-death consciousness survival is real. Even if I can’t prove it scientifically, if I can get personal validation, I’ll be happy.

But even with the experiences I’ve had, I question myself. Was I hallucinated? Or was it a case of self-fulfilling prophecy and I created the experience for myself? By paranormal investigating, I’m processing my own grief of losing my grandparents and my mother. So, for me, ghost hunting is my way of grieving.

Fear of the Unknown

This might explain why paranormal investigators get so rattled when something does physically manifest before us. In the paranormal community, I’ve noticed that there is an obsession with control. Meaning the investigator or the ghost hunter has to be in control of everything. We want to investigate the paranormal, but only on our own terms based on our own comfort level.

This is definitely a valid need because we don’t want things to happen to us outside of our boundaries. We don’t want our consent to be violated by having the spirits do more than what we are comfortable with. So, while paranormal investigators and ghost hunters want to experience and process certain chapters of history, we only want to experience on our terms and what we are the most comfortable with.

Dealing with Sins of the Past

There are a lot of elements in history that make us uncomfortable; slavery, child labor, abuse from leaders, etc. While modern-day paranormal investigators are far enough removed to not deal with a lot of these traumas first-hand, perhaps it still brings about negative feelings.

For example, many Americans are still just learning about the internment of Japanese-Americans, and it makes them uncomfortable. Some have even tried to justify it, even though they think the Holocaust was inexcusable. Then, I get messages from hopeful investigators asking me how to do a ghost hunt at an internment camp. 

While the situation above is directly related to an awful time on the dawn of the mid-20th century, it’s not all that different from wanting to investigate sites of mass bloodshed, like battlefields. Ghost hunters are also clamoring to get to places like Waverly Hills Sanatorium, St. Albans Sanatorium, and Trans-Allegheny Lunatic Asylum. The fact that places like asylums and sanatoriums grossly mistreated their patients and even wrongfully held perfectly healthy people captive for the sake of “medicine” is unsettling. 

It’s hard to think that our country, our parents, their friends, and our government may have participated in atrocities that harmed another group of people. Or worse, completely erase a culture.

Facing Our Own Trauma

We might also be affected by some form of trauma or illness and trying to find some meaning behind it in the paranormal world. This may result in researching cases where people have had more paranormal experiences after a car accident or having a near-death experience during surgery. One could argue that someone’s psychic abilities awakening after a traumatic experience could be a form of processing.

Even in poltergeist cases, which stem from extreme emotional distress, it’s a form of processing trauma. In this case, the process is working from the outside in.

Coping in Person

Paranormal investigating gives people the unique opportunity to be “in the room where it happened”, to quote Hamilton. We can go to the Lizzie Borden House and stand in the rooms where Andrew and Abby Borden were hacked to death with a hatchet. We can stand on the battlefields of Gettysburg and picture the men running and shooting and cannons firing in our heads while feeling the gentle breeze.

Battlefields are popular places to investigate. It also gives ghost hunters and investigators to look at these places in person and really get a sense of the massive amount of death that took place. We can see the actual place where these people once lived. Granted, anyone can do this by visiting historic sites, reading the information boards, listening to the audio tour, etc.

But paranormal investigating and ghost hunting takes it an extra step by making us believe we are talking to the people of that time period. Meaning, we are talking to the owners of the house, we’re talking to the murder victims, we’re talking to former patients of the asylum.

Choosing What to Deal With

Ghost hunting also gives people a specific choice in what kind of trauma and tragedy they want to deal with. For example, there is a lot of queer history with haunted prisons and mental asylums. Until 1976, sodomy was considered a felony in the United States. This means that locations like Trans-Allegheny Lunatic Asylum imprisoned homosexual men for being who they are. And yet, this is a chapter in paranormal media and history that is often ignored completely.

But as paranormal investigators, we have a certain level of privilege to completely ignore that chapter in TALA’s history and only choose to acknowledge what makes us comfortable. It’s not like these ghosts have manifested in reality and made us look at them and acknowledge their existence. Well, most of the time. However, this makes many people uncomfortable. So, while ghost hunting is used to process trauma, it gives the person a safe space to decide what kind of trauma they want to process. That is until a spirit makes itself known outside the box of comfort.

How to Move Forward

Now that we’ve talked about this, what do you think of this? Do you believe that we’re using ghost hunting to process trauma? It could mean different things like grieving, making sense with a problematic history, or trying to process a scary expeirence.

This can also explain why some people take it so personally when you debunk their photos, videos, and overall experiences. While you may be debunking their data, they take it personally because they see you invalidating their grief, trauma, etc. They also see validation in television and other paranormal media. It seems that as time passes, most of these people are able to remove their emotions from the situation and look at it more objectively without personal attachment.

With this in mind, there is something much deeper to the paranormal than just “looking for ghosts.”

Why We Don’t Need to Investigate EVERY Haunted Location

This may be the weirdest thing to say as a paranormal investigator. But, not all places need to be investigated. Some places are sacred and should just stay that way.

During my interview with Vanessa Hogle for The Spooky Stuff podcast, talking about her newest book Ghosts Abroad Ireland, she made several excellent points. A few of those points inspired this week’s blog. Vanessa and I were talking about traveling around the world and getting outside of our own box. We also discussed when it’s time to investigate, and when to step aside.

Know When to Investigate, Know When to Remember

I know this idea could be applied to every haunted location. It seems the older a place is, the more “okay” it is to investigate. Even in the United States, we have locations that paranormal investigators avoid. For example, the Freedom Tower in New York City and the location of the Twin Towers. Same deal for the location of the Oklahoma City Bombing. The list goes on. Given that these events happened in the past 30 years, it’s still fresh in the hearts and minds of most of us.

And yet, it seems time may eventually make investigating these locations okay. Or, if the event wasn’t something that affected us personally or something we didn’t experience, then it’s fair game.

Not every haunted location warrants an investigation. Vanessa made a strong statement about this with the Bon Secours Mother and Baby Home in Tuam, Ireland. This was a place that needed to be remembered, not investigated. If you don’t know the history of this place, you can check out an article here with the backstory.

Think about it, in most traditional paranormal investigations, we say something to the effect of, “Prove to us that you’re here by knocking on the wall.” This isn’t the place for that. We know these children existed. We know they lost their lives. It’s disrespectful of us to even challenge their existence. Some places should just be acknowledged and remembered for what they were. If it doesn’t feel right investigating a location, then it probably isn’t right and should be avoided. Also, consider how someone closely connected to that event may feel if you investigated that location.

Expanding Our Horizons

I think we all know by now that there are no two hauntings that are identical. So why do we approach paranormal investigations the same way no matter where we go? It seems that we tend to look at historical locations and think the same thing; they’re must be ghosts. Not only that, but it seems we put these ghosts in a box and we expect them to act and respond in a certain way.

Do these spirits respond as expected? Sure. But we can take it even further. We can expand our horizons and focus more on the individuality of each spirit. Take into account where the spirit is from culturally, and hone in on their context.

Regionally Different Hauntings

Vanessa mentioned that hauntings are different around the world. No two countries will have the exact same type of circumstances. Of course, every country has had its share of war, famine, trauma, etc. But each country’s context is going to be different. Paranormal activity is regional. The way spirits act in Ireland will be completely different than how a spirit acts in England.

This makes sense because, well, let’s just look at the living. We all act differently around the world and that’s heavily influenced by our culture. A person from Ireland will act completely different from someone who is from France. Of course, we all have awareness of these differences in the living and we’ll make adjustments from there. It’s the same for spirits.

Spirits will act differently not only based on where they’re from but also based on their time period. This is why I appreciate and highly recommend John Sabol’s Ghost Excavation method. He takes this concept and goes even further with it by completely diving into the context of spirit.

Understanding Their Circumstances

I truly believe (and recommend) that every paranormal investigator takes a class on cross-cultural anthropology. Not only will this help us better understand the people around us, but it will help with historical context. We don’t want to look at other people’s cultures only through our own eyes. Instead, we want to see their culture through their eyes. There’s a major difference between being a spectator and being a participant.

Finally, empathy comes into play here. I don’t think a paranormal investigator is truly a successful paranormal investigator unless they are empathetic. Having the ability to share and understand the feelings of someone else is an invaluable skill to have. You can still be balanced as an investigator, even if you’re more scientifically minded. Empathy could be the key to truly unlocking the mysteries of the supernatural.

Sexual Harassment: Exposing the Dark Side of the Paranormal

When the #MeToo movement became a national story in October 2017, it exposed sexual harassment in nearly every community around the world. Millions of women came forward sharing their own story with the hashtag #MeToo. It really brought to light the ongoing issue of sexual harassment around the world. When you see the numbers on paper, there’s no denying there’s a problem. However, there seems to be one community where the movement hasn’t been embraced; the paranormal community.

Sadly, this doesn’t mean that the paranormal community has been spared from the awfulness that is sexual harassment. This past year, it has become apparent that this is an ongoing issue with women (primarily) in the field. But it does affect all genders (male, female, nonbinary, genderqueer, pangender, etc.).

Sexual harassment is defined as, “unwelcome sexual advances, requests for sexual favors, and
other verbal or physical conduct of a sexual nature…when submission to or rejection of this conduct explicitly or implicitly affects an individual’s employment, unreasonably interferes with an individual’s
work performance or creates an intimidating, hostile or offensive work environment.”

But as we know, sexual harassment happens beyond the workplace. In the situation of the paranormal community, it is happening among colleagues and friends. The United Nations has created a comprehensive list that not only defines sexual harassment but breaks down the different types of harassment from verbal to non-verbal.

According to a 2018 article from NPR, more than 3 out of 4 women have been verbally harassed. Part of the statistics included cybersexual harassment, which is the most common form of harassment in the paranormal community. A non-profit called Stop Street Harassment found that 81 percent of women and 43 percent of men had experienced some form of sexual harassment during their lifetime.

This survey focused on folks 18 and older, and the results are from 2018.

What do these statistics mean for the paranormal community? Think about how many people are in the community. This means that it’s extremely likely that you’ve interacted with a victim of sexual harassment. It’s an awful pandemic that continues to happen and too many victims are suffering in silence.

But why is no one talking about it? Simply put; victims are either afraid to come forward or they come forward, but no one listens.

A Barrage of Messages

About a year and a half ago, I did a photoshoot in a two-piece swimsuit. In case you don’t know what I look like, I’m plus size. I did it for myself since I had never actually worn a two-piece, even in my skinnier days. I did it as a way to claim my positive body image. It was about body positivity and embracing who you are. Overall, it was well-received. But it also sent me thousands of friend requests and hundreds of inappropriate messages. These messages ranged from harmless flirting to full-out threats of sexual assault.

When I clicked the profiles of these people, I was shocked to see just how many mutual friends I had with them. These mutual friends were all from the paranormal community. They were in Facebook groups, they were on Twitter replying to paranormal celebrities. These people had a presence in the paranormal. They’re being called, “Brother” by my friends in the community.

The more I shared my story, the more people came forward to share their own stories. Often, we had the same harasser. I was also shocked to hear that people I had worked with were also offenders. But just because I had a positive experience with that person, it doesn’t mean that they aren’t capable of sexually harassing others.

Why This Happens

My story is not unique, nor was this the first time I received inappropriate messages. There are countless women and men in the paranormal community who are met with this on a daily basis. This is an ongoing issue that continues to be swept under the rug. Especially when the offender is a star in not just the paranormal community, but also the entertainment industry.

Whether we like it or not, there is a hierarchal structure in the paranormal. It’s also a world where professional lines are often blurred. Perps will take advantage of their status in the paranormal world, abusing their position of power.

The victims who have shared their stories to me have stated that they didn’t report it or come forward because they’re worried they would across as overreacting. Or, they’ll negatively affect their team/event/TV show, they don’t think anything can be done, or…they’ll face repercussions in the paranormal community.

Under the Rug

It’s frustrating when your offender is called, “Brother” by your peers. Ironically, it’s para unity that is the driving force in silencing victims.

It’s hard for people to acknowledge that their brothers and sisters in the paranormal are perpetrating sexual harassment and assault. Instead of facing the issue, folks in the paranormal community dismiss the incidents as lies. Or worse, sweep them under the rug.

Paranormal community members should not have to deal with such issues in order to investigate a location, get media opportunities, or even to become a mod or admin in a group. Everyone has a right to investigate free of harassment regardless of age, race, ethnicity, sexual orientation, identity, experience, etc.

Toxic Positivity

This just doesn’t affect the paranormal community, but also the spiritual community. We have to stop discouraging people from talking about sexual harassment because silence is condoning the behavior. Progress won’t be made if we keep discouraging hard conversations. Furthermore, we need to stop teaching that this behavior is normal and to be expected. Instead, we need to start having the conversation of how to stop tolerating it, especially if the harassment escalates in in-person.

We need to stop silencing victims, especially when they are trying to warn others of their harasser. It only encourages survivors to remain silent. There is a tremendous amount of guilt that can come with silence, especially if someone else ends up suffering because of said silence. Even if you don’t feel comfortable saying something for yourself, consider saying something for the next guy or gal that will endure the same treatment.

For the ones encouraging the silencing, especially claiming that “like attracts like” and insinuating that sexual harassment comes from talking about, just stop. Again, if someone else suffers because you silenced someone trying to speak out, that weighs heavily on your conscience and it can be a deafening and humbling experience.

How to Move Forward

Every paranormal group and organization needs to have a policy and protocol on sexual harassment. If you don’t know your group’s policy, ask about it.

To bring further awareness of sexual harassment in the paranormal community, I would also like to do a survey. Because I want to do it right, I’m going to need some help. If you are interested in assisting me in creating this survey, please contact me.

One of the strongest statements one can make is to confront the harasser directly. If someone is speaking to you in a way that you don’t want to be spoken to, say things like, “Please don’t talk to me like that.” Or “Please don’t touch me.” Say what you see, say how you feel, say what you want, and walk away. An example would be, “You made a comment about my body. I didn’t like it. Do not do that again.” Then, leave the conversation safely.

If you don’t feel comfortable confronting your abuser or reporting it, record it in great detail and tell other people about it. Keep any evidence or proof of inaction plus timelines, dates, etc. You can do this with something like a detailed diary entry. There are also tracking worksheets and downloadable templates in various anti-sexual harassment toolkits online. Venting to Facebook can be a cathartic experience. But it doesn’t always help progress with solving the issue unless you call out your abuser by name.

We need to stop tolerating this abusive behavior because “it’s going to keep happening” or treat it like some rite of passage. There need to be more conversations about sexual harassment in the paranormal community. By coming together, perhaps we can stop it, or at least discourage it and send a message that it will not be tolerated in the community.

How to Support Victims

The paranormal community must watch out for each other and encourage others to speak out. Even if you have only been a witness to sexual harassment, you have still experienced a hostile environment. You are indirectly being victimized by the behavior. This means you have the right to report on your own behalf. In addition, many abusers are repeat offenders, so when you report an incident, you are not just doing it for yourself, but also for the countless others following you.

If someone comes forward to you and tells you that they’ve been sexually harassed or abused, be there to support them. Also, ask them how you would like to support them. This is also important; never out someone by sharing their story. It is not your story to tell. Encourage them to speak out, but also respect their decision to not come forward. Here is a great resource on how to help survivors of sexual assault.

Personal Stories & Quotes

To close, a few people have graciously contributed their own stories and quotes on how to move forward in the community. Please note that these stories and experiences may be upsetting.

Since first embarking on my journey in the paranormal field I’ve encountered sexual harassment and biased at an alarming rate. When I began investigating at 18 years old I had no sense of right from wrong or how to deal with the situations I would be thrust into. The lack of confidence in myself or worth as an investigator has me accepting behavior that today I would firmly stand against. Well-known individuals speaking down to me as a woman, only allowing me on projects if I looked a certain way, coping feels in the dark are just a few scenarios I had to learn the hard way how to handle.

I’ve been sexually harassed by fellow teammates, banned from certain projects due to not wanting to get intimate with males involved, spoken down to during interviews, or told “Ill learn with more experience” when I clearly stated before I had worked on the specific topic in question…it’s a never-ending fight of showing the value in my experience and knowledge outside of how I appear physically.

My message to females in the field is we do not have to continue accepting this narrative. Our work is just as valid as our fellow male investigators. We should not have to succumb to sexual harassment, being belittled, told we have to wear certain clothes, or that our work is less than because of our gender. Stand true to your morals and know that any project that lessens your spark or dulls your spirit is not meant for you. The right ones will value you and never make you feel uncomfortable.

– Melody Knapp

Years ago, I won a trip to go on an investigation with a semi-local team. My wife and I road with the founder for a torturous 4 hours. I was insisted on riding in the front with her. Two hours into the drive is when shit hit the fan. The remaining drive was spent on the founder complimenting how young and attractive I was, grabbing my arms and squeezing. The worst was the stories of her fantasy world where she has multiple boyfriends and what kind of acts they have talked about doing and her asking extremely personal questions about me and my wife.

I tried to be calm and not listen because, well, we were not in our vehicle, we were almost there, and we had already paid our portion for the location. Plus, there were going to be investigators we really wanted to meet there. My wife and I both kept changing the subject, and we both were completely disgusted and just ready to get out the vehicle with her.

Once on location, things were finally better. For awhile. Just before bed, the founder was clearly under the influence, and the harassment was back. My wife was still investigating, and this lady was just stumbling. I didn’t want her to fall and hurt herself, so I kind of stuck by close. She then intentionally “fell” on me in the chair and that was her excuse for grabbing my… well you get it. Needless to say, we hitched a ride elsewhere and never spoke to them again.

– Anonymous

There are too many creepers out there. They’re in all walks of life, granted. We should be calling out their atrocious behavior and standing up to them whenever we see it.

Women deal with this every day in every aspect of the world. It‘s far too prevalent in our field. I’ve heard horror stories from female investigators who were harassed, propositioned, sleazed and creeped on, by males who seemed to think it was not only acceptable, but *entertaining.*

We should not stand by and let this shit happen. It’s a black mark against everybody who stays silent and tolerates it.

– Richard Estep

Resources

United Nations – What is Sexual Harassment

Sexual Harassment | U.S. Equal Employment Opportunity Commission

RAINN & National Sexual Assault Hotline. Free. Confidential. 24/7

Stop Street Harassment

Sexual Violence is Preventable – CDC

18 Qualities Successful Paranormal Investigators All Share

Paranormal investigators all over the world are constantly striving to be better, be the best, and try to be “successful.” I have to say that success will look different to every paranormal investigator. For example, some investigators just want to have an experience. That’s alright. Some investigators want to find proof of the afterlife. Next, you have investigators who want to make sense of the paranormal through some sort of research like history or science. Then, there are others who want to be influential to others and make a name for themselves. Finally, you have investigators who also want to be content creators. I’m sure I’m missing many other categories. These were the ones that popped up in my head.

For this blog, I observed some of my heroes in the field (go here for the list) and I took notes. I looked at how they reacted to criticism, adversity, and what they’re doing in the field throughout the year. Also, I polled my Facebook group and received input from my members. I was pleasantly surprised at the overlap of the qualities they mentioned and the qualities you see on this list.

Now, are there only 18 qualities? Of course not! Be sure to let me know what qualities you think make a successful paranormal investigator in the comments!

1. Possess passion

All successful investigators I know are passionate about this field. Passion is what drives them to keep going, and it also makes them happy. It seems that passion is the fuel that never runs out. You wouldn’t be involved in the paranormal in some capacity if it didn’t interest you and give you some drive. Otherwise, being in the paranormal is a miserable experience. Putting yourself through that isn’t successful. On that note, I need to follow my own advice.

2. Strive to uplift others

Uplifting others means that you will lift others up, even if it means you’re not getting recognition yourself. I’ve seen people in this community go out of their way to uplift someone, and that is awesome to see. When someone is not doing great, there are people to stand out because of their ability to give that person a boost when they need it most.

3. Share the spotlight

Whenever there is some sort of paranormal awards, or lists recognizing investigators, I pay attention to see the reactions. Some of the most successful paranormal investigators I know praised and uplifted the folks who got recognized. Being successful is knowing that the spotlight won’t shine on you all the time and you step aside with grace and let others shine.

4. Avoid gatekeeping

There are a lot of gatekeepers in the paranormal community. I’ve had my own skills as a paranormal investigator and researcher questioned because I don’t have psychic mediumship abilities. It’s insane. Or, I’ve seen people say things like, “You can’t consider yourself part of the paranormal because you’re not out investigating.” Finally, I’ve also seen, “If you’re not trying to find proof of the afterlife, you’re not an investigator.” Successful paranormal investigators don’t gatekeep in the field, nor have they come up with a checklist of things you have to do to consider yourself part of the community. Everyone is welcome in their eyes!

5. Willing to try new things

Something I’ve noticed some of the most successful paranormal investigators do is that they are willing to try new things. This is especially true before they give feedback or their opinion about something. I appreciate that they are willing to step into the shoes of others and give themselves a more objective perspective instead of being an armchair critic. Another thing to note is that trying new things doesn’t mean you have to keep using the tech or doing a certain method. Trying new things is a great way to expand the mind!

6. Adapting as the field changes

The paranormal field is constantly changing. There’s always new tech, new investigative methods, and new social media platforms to explore. Instead of digging their heels in and refusing to adapt, successful paranormal investigators adapt and move to the ebb and flow. Do old-school methods still have value? Of course! But there are also changes happening on a regular basis, and moving with the waves will make you grow as an investigator.

7. Willingness to learn

No matter how successful or how famous they are, these paranormal investigators are always learning. They are taking classes, reading books, listening to radio shows, and attending lectures. Successful paranormal investigators acknowledge that while no one is an expert on ghosts, there are experts in other areas like photography, videography, psychology, sound, etc. There is always something new to learn in this field when it comes to the “non-ghosty” stuff.

8. Use critical thinking

Successful paranormal investigators are constantly using their critical thinking skills. Rarely do they see evidence online and accept it as legitimate. They will ask questions and get as much information as they can. Critical thinking skills are a bit rare in this field at times. So when someone is thinking critically, they stand out. Sadly, they may get perceived as negative and closed-minded by others.

9. Set healthy boundaries

I’ll get on my soapbox with the awareness that I myself need to adhere to this quality. Setting healthy boundaries ensures your survival mentally and physically. A successful paranormal investigator is aware that in order to do well in the field, they have to take care of themselves. Sometimes, that means not accomodating every request that comes their way or investigating every weekend out of the year. Setting boundaries means different things to different people. Figure out what boundaries you need to set and you’re on your way to helping yourself get to success!

10. Recognize differences

This one is huge. In the paranormal community, there’s a popular mindset that basically says, “We’re all the same”, or “We’re all at the same level.” As I’ve said before, this is absolutely not true. We are all different in the paranormal with different life stories, skills, education, and background. It is only when we embrace these differences that we truly grow. Part of that is acknowledging that someone may have more skills than us, or they have more education in an area than us. The most successful paranormal investigators I’ve met recognize and honor these differences, and it’s beautiful to see.

11. Utilize healthy skepticism

This rounds up several points into one. Everyone needs a healthy dose of skepticism in order to be successful in this field. If you’re not questioning everything, thinking critically, and skeptical of paranormal events around you, you’re missing out on an opportunity to grow. Skepticism is needed in this field because, otherwise, everyone would be believing that every speck of dust and water droplet was their spirit guide or grandmother coming to say hi. We would be making no progress in this field.

12. Demonstrate humbleness

Being humble in this field can be tricky. You want to be confident in what you do, but you also don’t want to come across as arrogant and self-absorbed. It’s even harder to achieve this on social media when text doesn’t always translate the way that we want it to. Yet, the successful paranormal investigators I watch are so humble, and yet, they bring a room to silence when they walk in. They still have their authority and they are still confident, but they manage to balance themselves out with humbleness. That’s incredible!

13. Admit when they’re wrong

Admitting when you’re wrong is hard. I struggle with this. But, it’s necessary for a multitude of reasons. Sometimes, especially in the paranormal, we’re not always right. And yet, sometimes we think we’re right, only to be corrected. Less successful paranormal investigators will argue, they will dig their heels into the ground, and they will stand their ground until they’re red in the face. Successful paranormal investigators will admit when they’re wrong and use it as a learning experience.

14. Provide constructive feedback

Successful paranormal investigators say more than just “That’s not good” or “Do some research.” They provide constructive feedback that helps the receiver learn more. This can be hard if the person receiving the feedback isn’t receptive. Sadly, it happens pretty often in the field. But successful paranormal investigators offer feedback as they are requested to do so, and they are able to do it with immense kindness.

15. Able to debunk

Debunking can be a scary thing to do since so many in the paranormal community seem to align debunking with losing credibility. I will die on this hill; some of the most successful paranormal investigators I’ve met will debunk themselves. Or, they will graciously accept the information from someone else that debunks their work. For me, that’s impressive and I’m sure this is some superhero skill.

16. Compassionate and empathetic

Being able to use compassion and empathy while addressing difficult people is an incredible skill. If I could also add a third element to this, it’s that successful investigators also know how to set boundaries. Those boundaries are helpful when it comes to dealing with people in general. Having compassion and empathy with healthy boundaries seem to be one of the biggest qualities with my paranormal heroes and I really strive to possess those qualities.

17. Don’t invalidate others

This is another superhero skill I’ve noticed in the paranormal that I’m striving towards. Invalidating others rarely goes well because…well, you’re making that other person feel bad. Yes, there are certain ideas and beliefs that should be invalidated because they are harmful to others. This section isn’t talking about those situations. I recently watched a friend (who is a very successful investigator in my eyes) who was able to switch naysayers on a post and get them to agree with him. It was like watching a magic show. But what I noticed was that my friend didn’t invalidate their thoughts, and segued their thoughts into something more constructive and positive.

18. Don’t start drama

This is a big one. I’ve noticed that the successful paranormal investigators in my circle don’t start drama, nor do they get involved with drama. They’re not creating slam posts or making passive-aggressive comments attacking someone. But, to be honest, when someone envelopes all of these qualities, they typically don’t get involved in drama. More importantly, when someone brings drama to their front doorstep, they simply close the door and don’t let it in.

9 Things You Should Know About New Paranormal Investigators

This blog is for my fellow veterans out there who been out in the paranormal world for years. We’ve learned the ropes and we have the field experience. Over the years, we’ve chiseled our skills and gained incredible knowledge and experience.

But there are always new paranormal investigators out there who don’t know better. When I’m on social media, I’m constantly sad to see that the next generation of the field is often humiliated for not knowing something. Or, they get blasted with someone being condescending towards them because they don’t know better. There’s a lot of gatekeeping in the paranormal community. Frankly, this needs to stop. We will start losing what makes the paranormal field great if we’re not cultivating the next generation.

So, here are nine things you should know about new paranormal investigators.

They Will Ask Obvious Questions

Yes, they may ask those obvious questions like, “How do I get an EMF meter” or “What apps should I use while ghost hunting?” Dare I say that some of us may think these are “stupid” questions? But we can’t be like this towards new people in the field. It will either turn them off to the field completely, or they will be so closed off that they won’t be open to learning anything new. We need to be respectful when addressing questions that may seem obvious to us. Not everyone has walked in our shoes.

They Have Experience

Before we start going off and saying that newbie paranormal investigators are lacking experience, they do have something to offer. They may have experience in something that you know nothing about. When I was first starting out in the field, I didn’t know much. But I was a working photographer and I knew photography. I was able to offer that much to the team I was working with at the time. Don’t assume that just because someone is new that they don’t have anything to offer.

They Have Untapped Skills & Abilities

While their ghost hunting skills may be developing, they may have skills in communicating with people. And…ghosts/spirits are people! They may also have psychic abilities that they are trying to harness. I like to these of these folks like bulls in a zero-gravity china shop trying to find their bearings while trying not to float away. These are the rockstars. All they need is for one of us to reach out our hands and bring them back down to the ground.

They Watched the TV Shows

Most of the new people I’ve worked with have watched paranormal reality shows. This means that their investigation technique will likely emulate what they saw on TV. It also means that their paranormal knowledge may have come from the television shows. And that’s okay! It is up to us to validate their knowledge and praise them for what they’re doing right and then redirect and guide where they still need support.

They Have Connections

I’ve always said that just because someone is new to the field, it doesn’t mean they don’t have connections. They may know someone who owns a haunted hotel, or they went to school with a famous ghost hunter. I’ve basically used several bullet points to bring home the fact that new paranormal investigators have value and they have something to offer the world. This is especially true for the investigators that have been doing this for a while.

They Are Curious

Just as we are still curious about the paranormal, new investigators are just as curious as we are, if not more. They are navigating a new world and a new community. This means they will be asking a lot of questions. Some questions will be easy to answer while other questions may have you scratching your head. And it’s okay if you don’t have all the answers too! It doesn’t make you any less valid in your experience and skills.

They May Not Know Better

New people will make mistakes while investigating. It’s going to happen. Even the most seasoned investigator still makes misakes. But new people don’t know any better. They are still learning, finding their balance in this new world, and figuring out what style fits them best. It doesn’t mean they’re ignorant or less-intelligent. Just like you had on-the-job training when you started with a new job, new paranormal investigators are learning the ropes.

They Have a Fresh Perspective

To go along with a few previous points, new paranormal investigators are a fresh set of eyes on the current way we do things in the field. They are able to look at current methods and practices and offer their feedback. There may be something worth changing! Or there’s a glaring error in a certain investigative practice that we’ve never noticed because we are so set in our ways. New paranormal investigators give us the opportunity to change what we’ve been doing and make it better!

They Are Excited

Finally, new paranormal investigators are so excited to join the community! I will admit that I get desensitized sometimes and feel like that grumpy neighbor because I’ve been doing this for so long. It can be a little disheartening. But let me tell you, I love working with new paranormal investigators because they have this LIGHT about them. I get to see the paranormal world through their eyes, and their excitement is contagious. It is my duty to make sure that light keeps burning and I don’t do anything to snuff it out.

What do you appreciate about new investigators to the paranormal field?

The Shocking Differences Between Real Life Ghost Hunting And TV

One of the most popular panels I participate in at cons is the differences between real-life paranormal investigating and what we see on television. From my time hosting public investigations and working with new folks in the paranormal world, I’m often put in positions where I have to explain that what we see on television isn’t accurate to what happens in real life.

Simply put, paranormal reality television isn’t a reflection of what it’s like in real life. Here are some of the major differences between what you see on TV and what you may experience out in the field.

You May Not Have an Experience for Several Hours

Paranormal television shows show the best 30-45 minutes of an investigation that took place over the course of several hours, days, if not weeks. The clips you see on paranormal television shows may not have even been filmed on the same day. Usually, the first ghostly interactions happen within 15-minutes of the show’s start. This doesn’t happen in real life. And yet, I’m often asked within 30 minutes of a public ghost hunt where the ghosts are and why aren’t they talking? Well, it’s because these shows are very much a snip of a petal from a much larger flower.

It Might Be Boring

Ghost hunting television shows are exciting to watch. There’s music, dramatic clips, voiceovers, and more. This makes paranormal investigations look glamorous and dramatic. It’s not surprising that these television shows have managed to recruit most of the people in the paranormal community. But the real-life paranormal investigation isn’t nearly as interesting as what you see on TV. It’s much quieter, but it’s just as fulfilling if you set your expectations realistically.

Not Everything is Out to Get You

Paranormal reality television makes it seem like the spirits and entities are out to get the stars. But, in most scenarios I’ve encountered, the spirits are merely people. One of my favorite moments in a TV show was when the star is demanding that the spirits show themselves, and they respond with, “Do we have to?” How delightfully human is that? All in all, the entities that reside at a location are merely trying to get by in the afterlife. They aren’t the monsters you see on Scooby-Doo where they’re trying to get the stars.

Provocation Isn’t the First Thing to Do

Provocation is a jerk move, plain and simple. Yes, it’s great television and it’s entertaining. But have you seen what happens to television stars when they provoke? They get hit, bit, scratched, pushed, the list goes on. You wouldn’t walk into someone’s home and start provoking them, so how is it okay to do so during a paranormal investigation? While provoking is often used on TV, it is not the preference of most respected paranormal investigators. The only reason one provokes is to get a response. It’s not acceptable to do when one is alive, let alone doing it to someone who has since passed.

Television is Entertainment

Finally, you must remember that paranormal reality television is part of the entertainment business. Their goal is to entertain and maintain ratings. You will never see the ENTIRE story played out on camera. You’ll see snippets instead. While there may be some truth to some shows, that’s not the case with every show on TV. They have a storyboard. There are writers. A story needs to be told. What you see on a television show is the result of hundreds of pieces being put together. It’s the result of a team of dedicated filmmakers, all contributing something to the table.

Before you think I’m a complete hater of paranormal television, I’m not. Paranormal television has played a tremendous role in growing awareness of the paranormal and recruiting more people to the community. Therefore, it has value. As long as people know the difference between what they see on television and what is real-life, we’re going to be okay.

8 Things Paranormal Investigators Are Tired of Hearing

Interpersonal communication is so important in the paranormal field. At some point, you have to interact with someone in the paranormal, especially on social media. As I continue to get requests to work with certain people, I’ve heard it all. I’ll be honest and say that this list mainly consists of the things that *I* am sick of hearing.

1. “A team like nothing else…”

Newsflash, if you have to promote that your team is unique or different “like no other team out there”, chances are, you’re just like everyone else. Unless you’re doing something experimental like using Jell-O and zombie squirrels as a trigger object or something. Or, you managed to recruit aliens from several different galaxies and you’re investigating other worlds. It’s okay that we’re all pretty similar. It’s fine.

2. “You’re closed-minded…”

Paranormal investigators mainly run into this when they’re debunking someone’s evidence. I find this statement so ironic because the person who usually says it is more closed-minded than the investigator. If you’re asking people for their opinions and thoughts, it’s a bit rude to clap back with statements like this. Most paranormal investigators won’t tell you what you want to hear, especially when it involves an orb.

3. “No one is an expert…”

This one…is weird. Of course, when it comes to solving the mysteries of the other side, yeah no one is an expert. But, there are experts in the field in different specialties like psychology, architecture, photography, videography, socialogy, and certain areas of history. But yet, I’ve watched people ignore some really sound advice and input because “no one is an expert.” Yeah, maybe we can’t say what a spirit is, but we can at least listen to the folks in other areas who know more than us. Especially if you’re doing residential cases and working with the general public.

4. “Ghosts don’t do that…”

So, if “no one is an expert”, then why do the same people then tell us what ghosts and spirits can or don’t do? It’s like the whole argument that spirits disappear after 200 years. I’ve had people argue with me until they’re blue in the face saying this is a thing. Based on what? There are many problems with statements like these because, even though they’re not proven, they’re being used as facts. But I thought there were no experts?

5. “It’s a demon…”

If you ever want to get a paranormal invesigator to roll their eyes harder than bread dough, say this. This is problematic for so many reasons. For one, how do you know it’s a demon? Especially if you’re just watching a video or looking at a photo. Just because something may freak you out or give you bad vibes, it doesn’t mean it’s automatically a demon. A lot of things can give us negative vibes and it’s because of our flawed personal interpretation. Yes, I said it. Sometimes we misinterpret things and go flying off the handles. It happens. But awareness of said behavior helps prevent it in the future.

6. “Well, I’ve been on TV…”

So have many many many other people. If you’re a regular star on TV, okay, yeah, I’ll give you kudos. I’m impressed by how many people get catapulted to “celebrity status” in the paranormal field because they were on a mainstream show for 30 seconds. But then again, I see this happening beyond the paranormal field. If you were an extra on The Walking Dead, you can walk into almost any fan convention and have a line to your fan table out the door.

7. “Well, I know _________”

The paranormal community is a small world. It’s likely you’ve interacted with someone who’s been on TV at least once. That’s cool and such, but it’s not a replacement for education or credibility. I know some folks who will name drop like they’re throwing rocks. I’m usually okay with that until they use it as some sort of clout or trying to assert some sort of authority. I’ve already gotten that a few times from folks who want to be a guest on my podcast.

8. “We’re a professional team…”

Everyone should act professionally in this field. Period. Yet, the paranormal field is one of the only communities I’ve encountered that throws this word around. Again, like point number seven, it’s used as clout. It even goes back to point number one like it should be something unique. It’s not. And thank goodness it’s not. There are tons of investigators out there who act professionally. Using this term has the potential to be so problematic and it causes unnecessary discord when it’s being used to seem like they’re “better” than other teams. Another bit of irony: The folks who keep bragging that they’re professional are usually not. It reminds me of that quote that says, “A lion doesn’t have to say it’s a lion.”

Are there teams out there who are unprofessional? Definitely. But it’s best to not give them your attention. They eventually fade away while tripping all over themselves on the way out.

What are you sick of hearing as a paranormal investigator?

11 Weird Things I Wish I Knew About Ghost Hunting When I First Started

It’s hard to believe that I came into this field full-on in 2011. Sure, I did some “recreational ghost hunting” starting in high school, but I honestly didn’t know what I was doing. It was a lot of sneaking out at night, going to the nearby cemetery in Old Town San Diego, visiting the Whaley House, trying to talk to ghosts in the park, it was a fun time in my life. I didn’t know much about what it meant to be a ghost hunter, and this was something I had always had an interest in. Who knew that I’d be making this a significant part of my life?

But, there were growing pains. There were a LOT of growing pains. As I entered the paranormal community, there was a lot I had to learn about working with people while maintaining a “good” reputation in the field.

Paranormal Investigations Can Be Boring

This is probably the biggest lesson in becoming a paranormal investigator (or ghost hunter). I would dare say that what you see on TV is completely different from real life. Usually, what we see on TV is the best 30-45 minutes of footage. What most people don’t know is that the talent has been at that location for at least a day, if not more. What is seen on TV is an abridged version of their experience. Also, activity isn’t happening every hour, or even every few hours. You may find yourself sitting in the dark and chatting with your fellow investigators throughout the night. Of course, it’s all worth it when you capture that anamolus data that can’t be explained. And that’s why we all keep coming back.

Make Friends with Skeptics

Seriously. I know it may be scary, but please make friends with a skeptic. Subscribe to Skeptical Inquirer. Read up on James Randi and the work he did. One of my favorite skeptics that I think EVERYONE needs to follow is Kenny Biddle. What is great about him is that he makes himself available on different platforms where you can ask him questions and he will answer in a way that will make you feel empowered and educated. It’s important to be friends and network with skeptics because they will keep you honest and will keep you focused as you navigate the world of paranormal investigating and ghost hunting.

Ghosts and Spirits Are People Too

Ghosts and spirits are people, they just exist in different forms. Therefore, we should still treat them as human beings instead of this “spooky entity.” I’ve noticed a lot of paranormal investigators will have their “ghost hunter voice” when trying to communicate, which is completely different from their normal speaking voice. Time and time again, investigators have noticed that there seems to be an uptick in EVP responses during normal conversation. I truly think that speaking to the entities like normal people can make a difference instead of treating them like this spooky being in the shadows.

Evidence Review Takes Time

This is probably the hardest thing for me to do, especially if I have multiple devices to review. Let’s say you brought 4 recording devices with you, and you’re at a location for about 5 hours. After doing the math, you have about 20 hours of footage to review. Of course, once you get through that first device, you can make notes of significant time stamps and see if they correlate with your other tech. But still, it’s a long time to review data. How to manage this? Depending on the urgency of the case you’re working on, set aside an hour or two each day to review your evidence. A little each day goes a long way!

You Don’t Need Fancy Tech

I’ll say this until the day I join the ghosts; you don’t need fancy tech. Yes, I did write a list of cool tech items you need on your ghost hunts, but they will not make or break your experience. If you’re someone who wants to collect data and review evidence, then you’ll probably need an audio recorder and maybe a camera. But, I’ve worked with folks who don’t bring any tech with them and all they have is a pencil and a notepad. You’ll connect with ghost hunters and paranormal investigators who just want to have the experience. Meaning, they just want to make that connection to the other side, take in their surroundings. So, don’t question your legitimacy as a paranormal investigator if you haven’t dropped hundreds of dollars on tech.

Your “Normal” Life May Be Affected

I managed to keep my paranormal life separate from my “normal” life throughout high school and most of college. But I found that the deeper I dove into the paranormal, the more it started to bleed into my normal life…or as I sometimes call it, my “muggle” life. Once I started writing books, making television appearances, and then a YouTube channel, the secret eventually came out. Now, people at work know I’m a paranormal investigator, and I’m so lucky that they are cool with it. Occasionally, I’ll get asked about my latest experiences, which makes for a good break time story. But, it’s good to keep in mind how public you want to be about this incredible life and how it can affect your relationships and job prospects.

Some People Just Need Validation

This was an incredible lesson to learn as someone who does residential cases. Sometimes, people don’t want us to come and solve their hauntings. Instead, they just want validation that something weird is going on. Now, the client doesn’t always realize this. When this happens, we usually talk with our clients to make sure that the resolution they requested is the one they actually wanted. Our clients sometimes just want to confirm that they aren’t crazy and that there really is something spooky in the house, and that’s okay.

Not Everyone is Open to Being Debunked

This is a hard one sometimes, especially when people post photos on social media and say, “Look at this!” It’s easy to go ahead and debunk the evidence as dust, moisture, etc., but then we may be met with accusations of being unbelievers, close-minded, or one of those “evil” skeptics. I’ve always said that I think anyone serious about being a paranormal investigator should consider learning about the ins and outs of photography, audio, and videography. Yet, not everyone will do that, and sometimes they just don’t want to be debunked.

Be Careful About Who You Work With

When I first came into the paranormal community, I had a lot of people wanting to work together and network. I immediately dove in before I really got to know the person, and it ended up biting me in the butt in the end. I definitely recommend getting to know someone before working with them on any paranormal project. Observe how they talk to other people, especially the folks who are not as popular as them. I’ve seen a lot of my fellow investigators get looped into drama and legal trouble because they were looped in with the wrong people. Just be careful.

Psychics Aren’t Right All the Time

I’ve worked with hundreds of different psychics, and I can tell you that all of their gifts are different in some way. Just like how we all have different preferences, tastes, styles, etc., those with abilities have very diverse gifts. But, that doesn’t mean that they are right 100% of the time. The good psychics to work with are those who are open to being wrong and use those moments as learning opportunities. It’s okay if a psychic is wrong, they may just not be attuned to that location, or they are still learning, or they are trying to force something that isn’t there. For more information on this, check out my tips for psychics.

Paranormal Community is for Everyone

This wasn’t necessarily something I needed to learn, but there are folks in the paranormal community who like to gatekeep. Meaning, if someone has a past that may seem questionable, or they come from a profession that’s a bit taboo, there’s hesitation to welcome them in the community. I will say, that everyone comes from a diverse background, and we all have skeletons in our closets. If someone wants to be a part of the community, and they’re a good person (ie not stealing, lying, etc), they should be welcomed with open arms. There is room at the paranormal table. If you’re feeling shy or intimidated, come sit with me!